It's all in the delivery

I had an entertaining evening on Thursday. I had dinner in downtown Chelsea with my step-brother Michael and his colleague Bulldog. Now this Bulldog character can tell a story. I've got to give it to him, there aren't many people who can raise a laugh out of a serial-killer-roaming-your-neighbourhood story. But Bulldog did. I had to admire him. His timing was perfect. The delivery impeccable. Understated. Self-deprecating. Stunning.

I was taking tips.

Then, a story. A story about coming back from the camping ground showers in a pair of Y-fronts and a towel and getting into a fight with the annoying heavies in the tent next door. The towel was lost. Bulldog's dignity was revived in the fine telling of such a preposterous tale.

But hadn't I heard this somewhere before? Suddenly quite a few of his stories started to have a familiar sound. Wasn't this a scene in Choice Bro Caravan Park? Now, for the non-Australians, I will need to explain that Choice Bro Caravan Park was the brilliant radio drama of Merrick and Rosso. Rosso happens to be Bulldog's best mate.

I smelled a rat. Merrick and Rosso have been getting laughs out of their mates' stories for years. And why not? It doesn't matter who it happened to, it's all in the delivery.

And that got me to thinking. With some tips from Bulldog, I reckon I can become one of the great story tellers. And I don't even need my own jokes. It's what happens in the industry!

I'm spending the next few days working on it. Dave Levato once said to me, "Gabs I like your stories, but if they went for half the time, they'd be even better." And he's right. Bulldog's build up was just right. Timing. Delivery.

So to all my friends whose stories I've been dining out on for years: you got any more?

Good ridance evil personified

Am I the only one thinking the departure of the most evil influence in world politics has been dramatically understated?

Shouldn't there be parties in the streets all over the so-called free world? Shouldn't we be greeting the news with flowers and song?

Karl Rove was the inventer of dirty tricks politics. Dubya even called him "the Architect" (in all that that implies).

Let's not forget this is the man who got Dubya into politics. Some of his more famous dirty tricks include:
* massive phone arounds of black residences telling them the election was on a different day
* leaked a false story that John McCain had fathered a black daughter out of wedlock (McCain has an adopted Bangladeshi daughter) in the 2000 primaries. This was just one of the false stories he was spreading about McCain at the time. And McCain is in his own party.
* volunteered for a Democrat, then distributed 1000 invitations to a campaign fundraiser around Chicago's red light district promising "free beer, free food, girls and a good time for nothing"
* push-polling: arranging phone calls from supposed pollsters to Democrat voters asking questions such as "Would you be more or less likely to vote for [female candidate] if you knew her staff was dominated by lesbians?

And did he or didn't he leak Valerie Plame's name (an undercover CIA agent whose diplomat husband was a vocal opponent of the Iraq war) to Washington journalists? There's little doubt.

You can read much more about the father of dirty tricks at karlrovesucks.com

Someone whose political opinion I greatly respect once said, "The Democrats' biggest problem is that they don't have a Karl Rove."

Call me Pollyanna, but thank goodness, I say. I still believe there can be some good in politics.